The Last Ark of The Covenent
What do Chrissie Hynde, Sexual Consent and a Cup of Tea Have in Common?
When I was a student abroad in 1986, I suffered an attempted rape. I was fortunate, after a protracted struggle, to escape my attacker. Intellectually, I understood that he had absolutely no right to do what he did to me …
How to Handle the “Sex Talk” With Kids
“Mom, how old do I need to be before I can have sex?” Oh, crap. I am suddenly thrust into a very important conversation with the question-asker, my 9-year old daughter, that I WAS NOT expecting.
How to be Handy in Bed (NSFW!)
“I figured, despite a mild case of carpel tunnel, that my hands could pinch-hit for my euphemistically titled Downtown Dining and Entertainment District.”
How to Seduce Your Wife
“What could my Mother’s Day gift be? A Spanx trousseau which would make me feel like a slatternly bovine, and render me affronted, so I could lambast my husband with the misplaced anger I feel about everything else in my life.
Night Three: 101 Nights of Great Sex
My breasts were really quite put out. I’d already extorted six months of breast-feeding out of them back in 2005 …
He Had a Traumatic Car Accident and I Had to Grow Up
“As I sat by the broken boy’s hospital bed, trying not to flinch away from the constellation of scars on his lips, cheeks and forehead I knew it would look bad if I slipped away now …
I Was Used by a Catfish!
What if there are hundreds of wealthy sugar daddies dying to throw their money at me so I can finally get front row tickets to RiverDance and they’ll pay anything for Michael Flatley to come out of retirement just for me?
When I Met a Very Rude Boy
“Listen you privileged little shit, who do you think you are treating this well-meaning middle-aged woman so poorly …”
Top 14 Things To Do In Italy
You will get lost in Rome. You will get lost in Florence. You will get lost in San Gimignano and anywhere there is a paved road or a goat trail. And it won’t be charming.
Growing Up Slutty
Back in the car heading north on I-35, I sat sucker-punched. I hadn’t been called “slutty” since high school …
My 7 Best Summer Memories from 1975
“If any of his four granddaughters (not-a-one grandson!) complained about the fish guts, he’d yell, ‘Shad-up and do it! You catch ’em, you clean ’em, you cook ’em, I eat ’em.’
