The Last Ark of The Covenent
Who’s The Fairest Of Them All?
Sisterly Competition Bridget and I were lying in bed reading last night when she activated a sleeper cell to commit jihad against me. “Mommy,
Screwed by the Spring Sing
When I come in from work today I find Bridget flung across her bed scribbling furiously on a yellow legal pad. She’s using a
Arnold Schwarzenegger aka Arnold Schwarzen-ass!
I’ll Be Back Eleven years ago Arnold Schwarzenegger told my husband he would be a “SCHMUCK” if he didn’t get me to sign a
Married Sex: Fact or Fiction?
Sarah and Simon had been married ten years. They had two children, Octavia and Penelope, ages two and four. Their angels and their
Utah and Alcohol Don’t Mix
Utah is Beautiful. It has a gorgeous snow-peaked mountain range. A moonscape salt lake basin. Mormons who raise big families with well-mannered kids.
All About My Mother
Blaming Your Mom My sob story accompanied by violin in A minor: My parents divorced when I was two. Both remarried. My dad
My Kids Have Stealth Super Powers
It’s 3 p.m. I’ve picked Clare (7) and Bridget (5) up from school. Here’s what it sounds like when we get out of the car:
The Great White Huntress
Shopping Addiction To prepare for hunting season, first take note of where you’ve observed the Halteveres Gladiator Sandals or the Spectrum Caftan Dress
How Demand TV Ruined My Life
I’m about to make glassy-eyed love to my Demand TV. The girls are in bed after I read the illuminating Captain Underpants to them,
Spring Fever For the Over-Achiever
These Ukranian Easter eggs are overkill. Who’re they trying to impress? Are we supposed to live up to this fucacta? This will be brief. Because
Do You Fall Down?
Does anyone besides me fall down? Because I seem to fall down a lot. I’ve fallen down, epically, at least three times in
Leaving Las Vegas (minus the booze)
We’re on our sixth hour of driving from Las Vegas to Salt Lake City to visit family for spring break. Collectively Clare (8),
