Author: Shannon
How to be Handy in Bed (NSFW!)
“I figured, despite a mild case of carpel tunnel, that my hands could pinch-hit for my euphemistically titled Downtown Dining and Entertainment District.”
How to Seduce Your Wife
“What could my Mother’s Day gift be? A Spanx trousseau which would make me feel like a slatternly bovine, and render me affronted, so I could lambast my husband with the misplaced anger I feel about everything else in my life.
Night Three: 101 Nights of Great Sex
My breasts were really quite put out. I’d already extorted six months of breast-feeding out of them back in 2005 …
He Had a Traumatic Car Accident and I Had to Grow Up
“As I sat by the broken boy’s hospital bed, trying not to flinch away from the constellation of scars on his lips, cheeks and forehead I knew it would look bad if I slipped away now …
I Was Used by a Catfish!
What if there are hundreds of wealthy sugar daddies dying to throw their money at me so I can finally get front row tickets to RiverDance and they’ll pay anything for Michael Flatley to come out of retirement just for me?
When I Met a Very Rude Boy
“Listen you privileged little shit, who do you think you are treating this well-meaning middle-aged woman so poorly …”
Top 14 Things To Do In Italy
You will get lost in Rome. You will get lost in Florence. You will get lost in San Gimignano and anywhere there is a paved road or a goat trail. And it won’t be charming.
Growing Up Slutty
Back in the car heading north on I-35, I sat sucker-punched. I hadn’t been called “slutty” since high school …
My 7 Best Summer Memories from 1975
“If any of his four granddaughters (not-a-one grandson!) complained about the fish guts, he’d yell, ‘Shad-up and do it! You catch ’em, you clean ’em, you cook ’em, I eat ’em.’
What My Hair Was Trying To Tell Me
I was living with a man, at the time, who consistently broke my heart and was pursuing a career that didn’t want me.
Finally YSL’s Image of a Underweight Model Banned by the ASA.
I was shamed for wanting healthier models. Then the ASA agreed with me.
That Time I Was Offered Work in a Brothel
I’m in the Torture Room at Fran’s Ranch, a whorehouse in Beatty, Nevada. We’re shooting a scene for a low-budget movie called Leta Has Two Lovers …
One Father Says Goodbye to His Daughter. Stunning.
“Her room smells of alfalfa even though she has taken the rabbits.”
My Daughter Has Made an Unsettling Transformation
My daughter has become a cat. She turns 13 years old in six days, but she began the shift to coy feline about two months ago.
What Women Like In Bed
“A woman demanding (however subtly) to be dominated and controlled can have all this.” …
What Do Veterans and Stay-At-Home Moms Have in Common?
If you haven’t read Sebastion Junger’s latest piece in Vanity Fair, The Never-Ending War: The Bonds of Battle, you must.
When The Man You Loved Changes Forever
She did all the things besotted mistresses do. She waited for her phone to ring, she called his home and hung up when his wife answered.
2 Secret Things Women Want in Bed
As one woman put it: “I am tired of being that precious lady in the bedroom. I’m tired of ‘making love’ and doing things gently all the time.
Why Did Hot Paramedics Have to See Me that Way?
Into my bedroom strode not one, not two, but three insanely hot paramedics.
The Man With No Feet
This cannot be happening. Last week you fight off a happy ending massage and this week you’re going to be the victim of a foot-ectomy by a footless magazine salesman …
What to do in London
During one particularly gruesome scene, a character, who’d also provided comic relief, kills himself by slitting both wrists …
I Went in for a Massage and Might Have had a Happy Ending (London)
Thwackah! This was the sound of the 4′ 6′ Shimura whipping both sheets off me like a magician revealing the fact he’s made his assistant disappear.
Tales From an Inadvertent Matchmaker
One night at the Peninsula I noted two gentlemen eyeing Glenna and me from a neighboring table.
10 Things I Know About Beauty at 50!
Excerpt: #10. GIVE YOUR LOVER A PROPER KISS ONCE A DAY: