Shannon, Author at Shannon Bradley-Colleary

Do You Really Know Your Kids? Because I’m Clueless.

Just when you try to pigeonhole your kids, they change. This is Bridget (7): If tortured on a bed of red-hot nails I might encapsulate

My Unnatural Fixation With Gavin DeGraw

I’m obsessed with Gavin DeGraw. I had no idea who Gavin DeGraw was until he got beaten up in New York and my morbid curiosity

Requiem For a Heavyweight

September 16th, 2011 At 9 a.m. my stepfather Guido (yes, Guido, will all the ardor for life that implies) passed away due to the repercussions

I Know It’s Not Modern, But I’m In Love With My Husband

Henry (not his real name, his real name’s … Britannicus Maximus) — — drove up to Santa Barbara from our home in L.A. today to

How to Respond When a Child Prefers One Parent (And It’s Not You!)

My eighteen month-old toddler Clare prefers her daddy more than me. There it is. In black-and-white for all to see. A public indictment of my

Go The F#%k Back To School!

Here are the cretinous techno-monsters! They’re still here. In their bedrooms. In their pajamas. Beds unmade. Toys strewn. They’re bored. They’re addicted to technology. Their eyes glaze over, their

When The Drug Dealers Moved In Next Door

My grade schoolers now know this: “If you illegally sell marijuana the cops’ll bust you and throw you in the slammer where they’ll make you

I Don’t Want to Grow Up

One of my daughters wakes up crying and goes to sleep crying. My other daughter wakes up happy and goes to sleep happy. According to

Tonight’s The Night, Baby

Last night was going to be The Night. I felt a lurking presence behind me as I Googled “Thesaurus” trying to find a better word

Daring to Love

Here’s the problem with ice cream. You mean to eat it slowly so that your eating pleasure is in direct inverse proportion to ice cream’s

Show Me The Way To Go Home

Hawaii Big Island “Show me the way to go home, I’m tired and I wanna go to bed. Had me a drink about an hour

We Saw Saturn!

We saw Saturn with the rings and everything. It was little and white and … well, it could have been just a stencil laminated onto

The Bull and The Beehives aka Hawaii Big Island

“If we’re lucky we might get to see The Bull!” Uncle Robbie says. When he says this Clare and I are standing in a field

Don’t Make Me Fly To Hawaii!!

Our plane landed in Kailua-Kona, Hawaii at 8:02 p.m. last night. Once again we had cheated death. Mid-Pacific I thought I saw a gnome cutting

I’m a German Cleaner

(You see sweet, beautiful faces. I see Jenga blocks and light sabers running amuck!) I’m one quarter German. This makes it hard for me to

Of Trampolines and Yesterday

I took a bunch of kids trampolining today. I took this kid: (My oldest and her daddy long legs.) And this kid: (My youngest

I’m Co-Dependent with Octomom

I’m worried about Octomom. Fourteen kids. Eight of them are 2. Yesterday I threw my daughter’s tights at her when she STILL hadn’t gotten dressed after

Celebrity Stalkers — BlogHer "Voice of the Year 2011" Honoree in the Humor Category!

The problem with being a mom in L.A. is that we’re celebrity magnets. Stars — who spend their lives jetting to location on the Seychelles

The Kayak Trip to Hell and Starbucks

Why do OLD PARENTS think they can do a lot of stuff? Meaning me and Henry. Because we decided to take the girls down to

A Colleary Christmas – 2009 Cast of Characters: S – Shannon (44): Fairly well-preserved wife/mother/writer/controversial AYSO soccer referee and pseudo intellectual. Prone to occasional bouts of grandiosity.