How Many Paint Eggs Can you Drop out of Your Vagina to Make Art?

Two Women’s Epic Journeys

I consider myself a feminist. By that I mean, seeing traits that are still intrinsically considered feminine — compassion, empathy, the capacity to nurture and build communities — as sources of vitality and strength.

But I’ve got to say, I just can’t get behind the Vagina Feminists.

Did I just coin a phrase? I don’t know, but let’s give it a hashtag #vaginafeminists.

First, we had Aussie “performer craftavist,” Casey Jenkins, who knitted a scarf as long as the Great Wall of China from wool tucked up into her vagina.

She called the project “Casting off my Womb.”

She knitted in an art gallery for 28 days in order to capture her full menstrual cycle.

She said she undertook this project to “challenge the negative and fearful view of the female genitalia” to make vaginas less frightening.

I wasn’t afraid of vaginas UNTIL I saw her performance.

As a blogger I certainly can understand the desire to create provocative, water-cooler subject matter.

But where’s the line people?

Demonstrating that you don’t need someone to hold your yarn skeins while you knit because your vagina is up to the task isn’t going to win the hearts and minds of misogynists everywhere, and might even freak out those of us who really love our vaginas (mine is called Margaret Pennyfeather. Yours?).

I’d just recuperated from the vaginal knitter when, yesterday, a new #VaginaFeminist emerged.

A woman with eggs in her vagina.

And not just any eggs. Oh, no. These eggs were filled with paint and acrylics.

Swiss artist Milo Moiré, performing at this year’s Art Cologne Fair in Germany, stood on two stepladders, squatted over a large swathe of white butcher paper and squeezed several paint-filled eggs out of her vagina to create Splatter Art.

(Why didn’t Pollack use urethra paint pellets?).

Moiré called her endeavor, “PlopEgg.”

With no further ado …

Do you think Moiré has successfully achieved her desire to “(push) boundaries through art, living and expressing (her) art with (her) body and mind while opening mental doors,” or is she simply a really hot attention seeker?

16 thoughts on “How Many Paint Eggs Can you Drop out of Your Vagina to Make Art?”

  1. I am a conservative Catholic feminist 😉 if there is such a label, and you my friend are funny. Keep up the good wor.

  2. What the what???!!! Reminds me of the story of the African-American woman (I can’t remember who) who was put in a minstrel show because she could “smoke” a cigarette with her vagina. I think it was either Zora Neale Hurston or a character in one of her books. So bizarre. Doesn’t make me want to cozy up in that scarf, I’ll tell you that. Enjoyed the post though.

    1. Hi Lucille — When I watched the #VaginaKnitter my jaw was slung around my kneecaps. I don’t think I can wear anything knitted ever again!

  3. Two things came to mind; 1)TMI and 2)makes me glad I do not have a vagina :). But, on the other hand, without your blog I would never had imagined any form of art like these even existed. So, you have definitely broadened my education.

    1. Doug I actually had vagina nightmares last night. I thought I was in a cave off the coast of Ibiza, but it turned out to be a vagina in the seventh ring of hell. Anyhow, I’m glad I can serve as a source of education for you. In fact, that’s my entire purpose. xo

  4. Roseanne Salyer

    As always, you keep me abreast of all the things I didn’t know I wanted to know and some things I definitely don’t need to know. Thanks for the laugh.
    How do you think Milo keeps the eggs from being crushed before she ejects them and wouldn’t that wool tickle and be difficult to unwind? I don’t really want to know, just needed to say it out loud once.

    1. Roseanne — the Vagina Knitter said it was particularly difficult to extract the wool during her period and … you know what? I’ll stop right here. I’ve most likely traumatized you enough.

  5. I am so baffled and could not stop laughing. Like, seriously? I don’t even know what to say…my mind is just blank. I sent the link to my sister, I know she will probably pee her pants. I want to add more but my thoughts are just gone…scared away maybe…hopefully not for too long.
    Thanks for sharing this! Good for a laugh!

  6. You know, I think I’m pretty happy with the stunts my vagina can pull: It bleeds for a week every month (almost) without fail; and yet, I haven’t died. It helped me conceive two babies at the same time. It nurtures my health and that of my partner and my marriage. And, it’s a nice place to sit. No acrobatics needed to show its powers. #vaginastrong

  7. My favorite part of the vagiknitting is at the end when she says, “It feels really natural and really uneventful.” HA! If that happened at my house it would certainly be categorized as an unnatural, EVENTFUL occurrence!

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