The Last Ark of The Covenent
Mommy Flirting
I flirt with moms more than men these days. And not because I’m a lesbian, though that might’ve saved me some heartache in my
The Christ Child is Born
The Los Angeles Lakers showed up for the cesarean with my first child Clare. Okay. Not literally. My doctors – whom we’ll call Kobe and Shaq
The Day Before My Baby’s Birth
Gestation: 38 Weeks, 2 Days The day before my baby’s birth I’ve officially broken the forty pound weight barrier, coming in on the scale today
Three For The Road
Gestation: 35 Weeks, 6 Days The last few days it feels like Henry, Clare and I are doing everything as a threesome for the last
In Brazil, a Cesarean is Scheduled Like a Mani/Pedi
Gestation: 34 Weeks, 3 Days My friend Mary Rose had her second child, Maya, completely naturally. No drugs. What she did have was a wiccan-ish
The Ape Baby
Gestation: 33 Weeks, 5 Days In the last ultrasound our baby’s profile looked like a small ape baby face AND our house has been destroyed.
Why The Dental Suicide Rate is so High
Gestation: 32 Weeks, 2 Days I’m in the stage of pregnancy where I resemble a post-op frontal lobotomite. I spelled “of” “uv” the other day.
Firing the Babysitter
Gestation: 31 weeks, 3 days Henry’s mad at me for being mad at him regarding what time he comes home from work, which is the
How Dare My Babysitter Have a Life!
Gestation: 31 weeks, 4 days My world is spinning off its axis. My babysitter is leaving me.(Did I mention I’m a work-at-home-writer mom, which means
Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby
Gestation: 31 weeks As I swallowed a third Tums to quell the pillaging heartburn that comes of eating chicken milanesa when you’re nearly eight months
Monster Baby
Gestation: 30 Weeks, 4 Days I’m worried I won’t love the new baby as much as I love my firstborn, Clare. I had a dream
Santa Barbara Nightmare!!
Gestation: 29 Weeks, 5 Days Time: Noon Place: Santa Barbara Biltmore Activity: Solo weekend away Mental Condition: Foot loose and fancy free I’m sitting in
