“The literary equivalent of a summer night, a good friend and a gin-and-tonic: Shannon is a deft writer; a natural storyteller with a wicked turn of phrase and frighteningly specific memory...”

Opt-in to the Shannon Colleary Communiqué to have both the Funny & the Wise delivered to your inbox weekly!

Beauty, Buy & Bites

Back to homepage

The Habit That Keeps You Feeling Like Crap!

I Did It Too! How To Change Bad Mental Habits! I always thought if I could just get a screenplay I’d written into production I’d feel happier, more fulfilled, more confident and like I could finally let go of the

Read More

Does This Woman Look Trustworthy?

Hello Ninjas — I’m typing this while wearing nothing but stilettos and a smile … okay, I’m in my pajamas wearing reading glasses with oatmeal stains on my shirt. But I do have a cat ‘o nine tails whip an

Read More

Learn the Secrets to Korean Beauty From a Bonafide Rock Star! (Girl Band Nylon Pink)

Being an ordinary, humdrum white woman I tend to romanticize people of color and their culture. My black friend Lue had to tell me to stop fondling her hair. I didn’t realize white women annoy the crap out of black

Read More

How to Build Your Brand in 6 Minutes!

“Your Real Self + Your Alter Ego = Your Brand.

Read More

What My Hair Was Trying To Tell Me

I was living with a man, at the time, who consistently broke my heart and was pursuing a career that didn’t want me.

Read More

The Design Mom Book

If you don’t know Gabrielle Stanley Blair you absolutely need to.

Read More

The Man With No Feet

This cannot be happening. Last week you fight off a happy ending massage and this week you’re going to be the victim of a foot-ectomy by a footless magazine salesman …

Read More

10 Things I Know About Beauty at 50!

Excerpt: #10. GIVE YOUR LOVER A PROPER KISS ONCE A DAY:

Read More

IPL Before and After Pictures

I feel it’s my responsibility to try out all dermatological anti-aging procedures before you do, in case they are disastrous.

Read More

Do These Panties Make me Look Fat?

The Granny panties. You know the ones, tall and white and slippery and just tight enough to give almost any ass the appearance of a broad pancake.

Read More

What Makes You Feel Desirable?

At 49 I’m just not ashamed of wanting to be attractive and even desirable anymore. I don’t care that some people may think desiring to be desirable is an affront to my husband and my marriage. Or that they may think I need to get a life and help build houses for Habitat for Humanity. Or that they may think I’m guilty of the 3 Vs. Vapidity, Vacuousness and Vanity.

Read More

How Becoming a 1950s Pin Up Girl Boosted my Body Image!

Last week I got to be a Bombshell. I’ve always wanted to be a Bombshell, and am grateful to chocolate and french bread for making it all possible. Like a lot of women, I always have my eye on what

Read More

Colbie Caillat’s “Try” Made Me Cry

My new favorite song from Colbie Caillat. But the glorious images rival the beauty of her voice.

Read More

My Daughters They Would Never Speak to me Again (Funny)

Okay. This is funny even if you’re having period cramps. Don’t want to publish any spoilers, so all I can really write about this is: #flocomestotown #theredbadgeofcourage #surfingthecrimsonwave #thecurse #therearecommunistsinthefunhouse #reddotspecial First Menstruation. Enjoy!

Read More

Fact: The Way We Eat Our Food Is The Way We Make Love

If you’ve been anywhere around this site or my social media networks you are probably incredibly sick of seeing my 1950s pin-ups. I’m posting them everywhere because I love them. These photos are a reminder to stop the negative body

Read More

The Scar Project

Are You Afraid Your Body Isn’t Beautiful After an Accident or Surgery? (Body Image Issues) Today I received a comment that made my heart ache. Melanie read Ruby’s story in our Love Your Body Now series and wrote this: “Ruby

Read More

My Ultherapy Before and After Photos Part 3

My Ultherapy Before and After Photos are Here!  (I’m revising this post, almost two years after having this procedure, as my opinion has changed in that time). I must love you ladies a lot to post my Ultherapy Before and

Read More

How I Came to Love My Soft Tummy

Body Image Issues Begone! “What’s this?’ I asked a roided-out Gold’s gym employee. I was holding a fistful of my own soft, round flesh, which seemed to have suddenly appeared beneath my belly button two Mondays ago. I was twenty-eight

Read More

A New Study on how to Heal Body Image Issues (The Kissing Video)

Okay, just stop judging your body. Have you stopped? Good. Now, how does your body feel? Mine feels pleasantly tired after working out hard in Pop Physique. My hands are a little sticky and sweaty on the keyboard. My tummy

Read More

Are You Spectatoring During Sex??

My first lover was a USC football player with 0% body fat. He looked like this: You’d think we would have had hot sex. And every now and then we did. But a lot of the time I was, what

Read More

Two Secrets to Losing Weight (Even Over The Holidays!)

I’m vanquishing bad habits and losing weight. Because I was such a Skinny Minnie who could eat anything I wanted until I turned about 40, it’s been tough for me to change my lifelong habits of snarfing anything sweet, cheesy

Read More

10 Things I did to Prepare for my 30th High School Reunion (Before and After Photos)

This is what I did to prepare for my 30th high school reunion: 1. Over-indulge in wine coolers and nervous carbohydrate eating. 2. Gain 5 lbs. 3. Develop new mantra: “You’re still a skinny bitch.” 4. Wax my mustache. 5.

Read More

Husbands and Wives: The Saladarians

This is the latest in my Husbands and Wives Series: Me: Henry did you know that you spend about 85$ a week on buying salads at Whole Foods. Henry: That’s impossible! Me: Here, look, I collated and printed out our

Read More

I’m In Love With An Incredible Woman! Gabrielle Blair of Design Mom.

I tend to be a “look at me, look at me” kinda gal.  I danced on bars in my twenties. For free.  Sometimes I was asked to stop doing that. But to those of you who trust me not to

Read More

What Is Your Hair Identity?

I was going to write about the three main reasons America failed in Iraq: 1. We disbanded the Iraqi army leaving a bunch of 20-year old boys without jobs, but with lots of guns. 2. We cut too deeply in

Read More