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My Wittiest, Wisest, Most Inappropriate Commenters (Andy) This Week!

Couch seductress 2My favorite comments this week!

I’m frequently thrilled by how funny, insightful and creative twfkab commenters are, and how much I can adore people I’ve never even met.

The internet certainly can be used for evil, but the good that rolls around out there in the ether is just so encouraging.

I want to say THANK YOU to all the folks who visit here and support my endeavors, however misguided they may be. xo To this query on my fan page:

TWFKAB: Men? What do you want for Christmas? (Besides fellatio, of course).

Maddie: Why the hell would he ask for something he gets every day anyway?? Yes, I am bucking for best wife ever!

TWFKAB: You’re making us look bad, Maddie.

Todd: Maybe I’d shouldn’t throw neckties and socks into the discussion?…

TWFKAB: Depends on what you use them for.

Andrew: How about a Dirty Sanchez?

Andrew: Oh, by the way, don’t google that term … just a warning

TWFKAB: I expect you’ve learned that from experience!

TWFKAB: Okay, now I have to google it.

TWFKAB: Oh, I wish I hadn’t!

John: An intelligent, witty, self-actualized ex-gymnast with a trust fund and a trick hip…

TWFKAB: John you need your own blog. I’m hunting down your woman for you. I won’t take anyone who can’t do a triple-saw-cow.

Maddie: Dedicated this year to rockin’ the marital sheets — been a very fine and interesting year!

TWFKAB: Maddie, Just knock it off!

John: Reciprocity is the key — you can unzip more flies with honey …

John: A gentleman does not discuss his tricks … So give me a minute and I will tell you things that will make your irises blush.

In a post about Open Marriages on my Fan Page the same smart, funny John wrote in with some excellent relationship advice:

“In a relationship, you both need to wake up and show your partner in at least one small way that they matter to you.
“You have to do it in a way that matters to them.
“Every day that both of you do that, you are adding a brick to the foundation of your relationship.
“Every day that one or both of you don’t show the other that they are valued, you are taking a brick away.
“The longer you both do it, the stronger the bond.
“There will always be times when things are out of balance, but if you build a strong foundation, it can outlast those times when some bricks are washed away.”

In my post, The Moustache Debacle, when I was lured into buying Henry a shaving kit that costs more than a Rolex John also wrote in:

“Better than an expensive shaving kit – buy him a regular old pack of his usual razors and shaving cream. Then wrap them with some new lingerie for you, and tell him that once every week this year, you are going to strip down to that outfit and shave him.”

Excellent advice. John is my new love guru. And ladies, he’s single!!

On my post The Death of Sweetums Meredith replied:

“We have two toddlers, so the (sex) doldrums are definitely our domain. For now. I hope. Our last anniversary, we had sex in the third row of our minivan at the top level of a parking garage after a stand-up comedy show. It was HOT!”

This is a woman whose marriage is going to last!

Guys, thanks so much for engaging and commenting and letting me know you’re out there.

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  1. Sharona Zee
    Sharona Zee 6 December, 2013, 12:54

    why have you not fixed me up with John?

    Reply this comment
  2. John Collins
    John Collins 6 December, 2013, 18:18

    Unfortunately Sharona, I think the commute from Texas to Vermont might be a bit of an issue…

    Reply this comment
    • Shannon
      Shannon Author 6 December, 2013, 20:56

      John — if I find you a wife I want a kickback, but ladies he’s special. I have to vet you.

      Reply this comment
    • Sharona Zee
      Sharona Zee 7 December, 2013, 09:39


      the distance might be a problem…if I wanted to sleep alone, I could have just stayed married (rimshot)

      What about that modern couple 2-house thing? Winters in Texas, Summers in Vermont. (flip that around, and you’ve got a life Weather Hell)

      We both love TWFKAB (that’s one thing we’ve got) 🙂

      Reply this comment
  3. John Collins
    John Collins 7 December, 2013, 05:24

    On a scale of a dollar to being best man at the wedding, what do you have in mind? I am not opposed to getting remarried, but it is not the current goal – so you might want to pick a different trigger for your payoff. Being a single Dad is more of a full time job than my career, so dating has been rather hit-and-miss. I could give you a ton of material about the pitfalls of online dating.

    Reply this comment
  4. John Collins
    John Collins 7 December, 2013, 18:47

    I don’t know about you Sharona, but I am not going to retire for another 20 years, so I am pretty well tied up here (innuendo rimshot). Austin is nice, but Burlington is perfect.

    Read “Uncoupling” by Diane Vaughn. I went through five years of that too before my divorce. The book describes the mechanics of how a relationship ends. It really helped me gain closure, and it opened my eyes about how long the process was going on before I had a clue.

    Reply this comment
    • Shannon
      Shannon Author 8 December, 2013, 19:23

      Am I hosting a burgeoning love affair?? Who says you can’t have a romantic rendezvous somewhere in the middle??

      Reply this comment

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