“The literary equivalent of a summer night, a good friend and a gin-and-tonic: Shannon is a deft writer; a natural storyteller with a wicked turn of phrase and frighteningly specific memory...”

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Marriage Advice & Stories

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What Happened When Henry And I Dabbled In The Sexy BDSM Underworld

(This post contains graphic sexual content which might convince you to never have sex again) Before kids Henry and I decided to walk on the wild side one night when we accepted an invitation from friends to attend a BDSM

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Why My Wedding Anniversary Means Nothing To Me

Henry and I don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day.  We tell each other not to get each other gifts for our birthdays.  We had our 12th wedding anniversary at Shutters On The Beach on Monday, but now I’m thinking we don’t really

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Sexual Dissatisfaction: When Your Spouse Is No Longer Attractive To You

Recently a reader contacted me regarding my Married Sex series to tell me her story in the hopes of getting some answers. We’ll call my reader Maggie and we’ll call me Herr Sexologist. Maggie has been harboring a secret for

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How Crushing on Gavin DeGraw Almost Got Me Killed

Today is a blog hop day. At the bottom of this post several lovely writers from #GenerationFabulous will also be writing about their Celebrity Crush. Here’s mine: I love Gavin DeGraw. Is he handsome? Moderately. Does he sport a six

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I May Have to Gag My Husband

Henry is outside as I type this reading the first draft of a book I’m writing. It was quiet out there when I entered. His face appeared stern as he read. He hates it. I can tell just by the

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Gone Fishing Over The Holidays (And Our Christmas Photos)

Hello, dear fellow humans. I have not felt like updating and writing. I’ve felt like eating Christmas cake cookies and drinking egg nog spiked with Thunderbird. Which means I’m fat and happy. (Maybe a little too happy). So I’m going

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Is Bad Sex A Good Reason to Divorce?

My friend Bethany kept falling in lust with men at her office, which would’ve been fine except that she was in a seventeen-year marriage with two teenaged daughters. She was never physically unfaithful to her husband Doug, but the cost in

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The Happiness Photos

I’m happy today. What the hell am I going to blog about? Oh, Happiness how you foil my creativity! How soft and sloppy you make me! How ineffably boring. Here are my happiness photos: But don’t worry, I’m certain my

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How Many Pre-Marital Lovers Is Too Many?

My friend Maggie (who gave me permission to write this) is a volunteer at her children’s elementary school in Seattle, Washington. She’s on the crunchy-granola side, makes all her kids’ clothes, bakes the most delicious, homemade rustic loaf and corn

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Dissection of the Ménage à Trois

1988 was a banner year for me. I was separately invited by two male college friends to engage in a ménage à trois with them and their wives. I was never flirtatious with or attracted to these men. I didn’t have

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The Man You Want May Already Be In Your Bed

Friday night our daughters Bridget and Clare both had sleepovers elsewhere. They were gone by 5:30 p.m. and were not to return until the following morning. Henry and I were home alone for the first time since the new millennium.

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My Husband Lets Me Pose Nude!

My husband Henry is 52 years old today. Isn’t he handsome? I know, I think so too. What Henry Tolerates: Me posting my nudes online. Me writing about our sex life. Me shopping like a slavering addict at Boden when

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What I Wish I’d Known Before My Wedding! (Photos)

I managed to convince Henry to marry me on May 27th, 2001. It only took me five years to get him to do it. Granted three of those years we were just friendly acquaintances and I was trying to get

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Should Marriage and Pornography Get In Bed Together?

All people in this post are amalgams of people I know, so if you think this is about you … it probably is. My dear friend, henceforward known as Crystal, (a name I used once to great effect) called me

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Happy Father’s Day: An Image Is Worth a Thousand Words

This is what makes a father great: To my own dear dad on Father’s Day…

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11 Wedding Anniversaries In Photos

Sunday Henry and I celebrated eleven years of marriage by gorging on red meat and tippling mescal while I blew my fluey nose into cloth napkins at Boa in Santa Monica.  Here are one wedding day and 11 anniversaries: We

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Fifty Shades of Wife Dominatrix

“I want you to dominate me!” I announce to Henry. “Wha…?” Henry’s asleep. It’s midnight on Sunday. I’ve flipped on the light switch. He blinks at me mole-ishly from his protective, fetal position under the duvet. “I want to be

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2 Ways to Deal With the Bitch Inside

I have a new Monday Sin I’d like to deal with: Anger. I lost my marbles on the train platform at the Grand Canyon Saturday. Actually a more astute phrase might be “I went batshit crazy” aka “I was channeled

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When Did I Know My Husband Was A Good Man?

Friday Wrap-Up: When Did I Know My Husband Was A Good Man? I chose to date one or two …hmmm … how shall we say …losers? That’s probably not fair. Let’s just say … okay, losers. For example a certain

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How To Seduce Your Husband and Spice Up Your Marriage

“I’ve looked on many women with lust. I’ve committed adultery in my heart many times. God knows I will do this and forgives me.” Freakin’ Jimmy Carter, man, he lays it out there. Okay, so I’ve had this fixation on

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My Last Post On Blogspot! aka Batwoman Says Good-bye

This will be my last post on Blogspot, (in case the title was ambiguous or you’re on crack and can only hear the high-pitched whistles dogs howl at). I have no feelings about Blogspot except it seems to have a

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I Know It’s Not Modern, But I’m In Love With My Husband

Henry (not his real name, his real name’s … Britannicus Maximus) drove up to Santa Barbara from our home in L.A. today to pick up our kids at my mom’s house where they and I have been frolicking and creating

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Jealous of that Bastard Daddy! (Gestation: 22 Weeks)

My eighteen month-old toddler Clare loves her daddy more than me. There it is. In black-and-white for all to see. A public indictment of my mothering skills. C : “What’s she doing here?” H:  “Just ignore her and maybe she’ll go away.”

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Tonight’s The Night, Baby

Last night was going to be The Night. I felt a lurking presence behind me as I Googled “Thesaurus” trying to find a better word for “engorgement” (don’t ask) on the internet. I turned to see Henry standing behind me. He was

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Man Garage

My husband to the Garage: What happened to you? You used to look so pulled together? The Garage to my husband: I knew it! Once I was enough for you, but now you want one of those freakishly large, four-car garages! They don’t

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