“The literary equivalent of a summer night, a good friend and a gin-and-tonic: Shannon is a deft writer; a natural storyteller with a wicked turn of phrase and frighteningly specific memory...”

Opt-in to the Shannon Colleary Communiqué to have both the Funny & the Wise delivered to your inbox weekly!

Let Them Eat Orange Rinds aka Traveling With Kids in Paris

TRAVELING WITH KIDS IN PARIS!

Shhh. I’m hiding in an internet cafe on Rue Thouin across the street from the apartment we’re renting on the Left Bank in the Latin Quarter in Paris.

traveling with kids in Paris

The Carousel outside the Hôtel de Ville.

Henry left us for the day to travel to Verdun to meet an Englishman who travelled through the Chunnel from London in order to take my husband on a tour of the most violent, dreadful battlefield of World War I.

The Germans vs The French in a pyrrhic victory (meaning one where no one won), leaving me with la petit filles to shop, eat, museum, shop, eat, museum, whine, extort, kvetch, troll for souvenirs, et al.

Which is why I left said daughters with my mom for a moment of internet cafe glamour por la nuit. I wasn’t gone for two seconds when the harassing texts began:

Mom’s Phone: “Your farts smell like tomatoes! From Clare.” (aged 11)

My Response: “Your farts smell like asparagus.”

Mom’s Phone: “Help!” (This message must actually be from my mother)

My Response: “Poor mom.”

Mom’s Phone: “Waasaaah.” (not sure what language this is, but I get the point.)

My Response: “Beat them if you must.”

Mom’s Phone: “Never!”

Mom’s Phone: “Could you pick up baguette?”

My Response: “Could be here awhile. Can u take them out to get one?”

Mom’s Phone: “Don’t have a key. Never mind. We’ll starve.”

Sigh. Going to find baguette and impale myself upon it. That fucking Henry and his war re-enactments. I won’t even get into the Liberation of Greve on our honeymoon!

(If you like feeling French sign up for TWFKAB mailing list HERE! and for more on our trip to Paris click HERE!)

Traveling with kids in Paris

They make them cute so you don’t sell them to Gypsies. Clare with Pierre on the Seine after visiting this … 

Traveling with Kids in Paris



5 comments

Write a comment
  1. Serena Belva
    Serena Belva 6 January, 2014, 07:32

    I’m jealous. I have never been to France. It looks cold there! Today in east Tennessee it is only a high of 21 degrees and I am longing for warm weather. Safe and fun travels!

    Reply this comment
    • Shannon
      Shannon Author 7 January, 2014, 13:53

      Hi Serena — Don’t be too jealous. I will come home much poorer and chubbier. It is “brisk” here, but apparently not as “cold” as usual. Coming from L.A. I am so enjoying the fresh, colder air.

      Reply this comment
  2. KymberlyFunFit
    KymberlyFunFit 13 January, 2014, 23:33

    I think gypsies pay more for the cute ones. Could pay for a lot of cafe au laits. Just putting that out there.

    Reply this comment

Write a Comment

Your e-mail address will not be published.
Required fields are marked*