-
When You’re Over 45 You Might Need To Have The “Second Talk”
July 26th, 2012
It’s June 27th, 1975. My 10th birthday. Will I get a fast growing hair Barbie? I rip through the Snoopy wrapping paper to discover … Sweet Suzie’s Starter Menstruation Kit. WTH?“Go ahead, honey, open it,” says my mom, face shining beatifically as if I were the first female astronaut. (Perhaps foreshadowing Lisa Nowak wearing her premeditated murder diaper circa 2007).
Then mom and I proceed to have the “First Talk” about when Flo comes to town. You can imagine my sense of betrayal that once a month, every month, for the rest of my childbearing years I’d have to forego drowning my brothers in a friendly game of Marco Polo in the backyard pool.
Guess what? Very soon I’ll be able to drown my brothers any time of the month I choose because I’m 47-years old, and it’s time my mother and I should have the “Second Talk”: What to expect during Menopause.
Here’s what I know about menopause from Oprah. It will be the worst thing that’s ever happened in your mother-loving life. Hot flashes. Insomnia. Depression. Vaginal Dryness/Odor (ack!). Lower Sex Drive. Unwanted Hair Growth…
An extreme example of menopausal hair growth!
And oh yes, Zombification. This is where you try to eat the ones you love.
But guess what? There’s a “Second Talk” Menopause Kit! aka the Poise Feminine Wellness Line.
Full disclosure, Poise and BlogHer is sponsoring this post, but it’s perfect for my site and for this time in my life. I love the idea of a “Second Talk” because it feels like a new beginning rather than the road to oblivion. I’m hopeful there will be much gained in this life transition, and Poise is offering products to allay some of menopause’s irksome symptoms.
(I’ve thoughtfully pointed out how they can be helpful for men, too!)
Roll-On Cooling Gel: helps you feel comfortable and refreshed when a hot flash strikes. Squeeze the tube and gently roll the cooling gel on wrists, chest, or neck for a cooling sensation that lasts up to 10 minutes. (Men: this can be useful for you when watching Sofia Vergara on Modern Family with your wife in the room. Never let her see you sweat!)
Personal Lubricant: is designed to enhance your intimate moments. This lubricant features an easy to use bottle and is glycerin, paraben and fragrance free. (Men: especially helpful as a scent-free aftershave lotion).
Feminine Wash: provides daily freshness with a unique formulation that is pH balanced for your intimate area. Glycerin and paraben free, this gentle wash has a non-irritating formula and will help you feel clean and confident. (Men: have you smelled your undershirts lately? Trust me, you can use this stuff. Don’t get me started on your tightie whities).
Poise wants to make sure that all women feel comfortable and confident heading into the next stage of womanhood. Take the Pledge to have the “Second Talk” before October 18th, which is World Menopause Day, and join the conversation.
When were you most mortified by bodily malfunction? (For me that would be when I was standing in a full gymnasium for my high school Spanish teacher’s retirement, ran into my unrequited high school crush and had my first hot flash. They say timing is everything.)
And when are you most confident? (For me that would be when I make a beach landing behind enemy lines in full Navy Seal gear.)
Leave me a comment with your answer to be entered for a chance to win a $250 Visa gift card, courtesy of BlogHer and Poise!
Have the “Second Talk” with me xo
Rules
No purchase necessary to enter or win.
Only unique Entries will be counted; duplicates will not be considered as an additional entry.
You may receive entries on this post by selecting from the following entry methods starting on July 26, 2012 at 9 a.m. PT and ending on August 24, 2012 at 5 p.m. PT:
a) Leave a comment in response to the sweepstakes prompt on this post.
b) Tweet (public message) about this promotion, including exactly the following unique term in your tweet message: “#sweepstakesentry”; and leave the URL to that tweet in a comment on this post.
c) Blog about this promotion and leave the URL to that post in a comment on this post.
d) To enter without posting comments, see official rules.
This giveaway is open to US Residents age 18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail and will have 72 hours to respond or a new winner will be selected. Void where prohibited.
Be sure to visit Poise’s brand page on BlogHer.com where you can read other bloggers’ reviews and find more chances to win!
Share and Enjoy
137 comments > Write one
TWFKAB is also in:
The Woman Formerly Known as Beautiful
Aging Vaintress, Mom Butler, Wife Dominatrix, Surma Stick Fighter
- Like, Share, Tweet or Pin TWFKAB
- MORE SHAN-ANIGANS:
- Download Both Books!
- Into The Child Named Best of 2012
- TWFKAB Awards:
- Grab the Badge!
-
Loading
I’m most confident when I’m tan, botoxed, and it’s payday!
Love it!
I think the hardest for me was explaining (over and over again)that I actually was in menopause at 38. Now I’m used to being asked when my last period was and I simply answer honestly: 2006.
I am so ready to say good-bye to Flo. I was ready when I was 12.
You are as hysterical as I thought you might be with words! I would tell everybody on Facebook had I not been banned by the Facebook police for having an opinion about my own life – Apparently they are big fans of Miss Rita’s work having been made witness to her brilliance at the Screenwriter’s Showcase – All in good fun if you can’t have a little levity when life hands you a key lime pie when you only know what to do with lemons then what is the point in the end after all…
I think Rita may end up being a character in my next script. I never knew she was so eviiilllll!
my wife has been menopausal last couple of years.. makes me (hubby) want to go back to the good old days of PMS..I cant wait until this is over so i can bring the steak knives back from storage..JOe
Joe you always crack me up. My husband doesn’t walk through the house anymore. He darts.
cooling gel and Sofia vegara wouldn’t work for me, i still make motorboat sounds with my lips when i see her (them) I just cant help my self..women get menopause men just become dirty and old. JOe
Even I make motorboat sounds when I see Sofia Vergara. She’s just yummy.
Your hair growth looks SOOOOO much sexier than mine! Perfect when paired up with a smoking gun! Mine is more suited to be paired up with a turban
I can hardly wait to meet your hair!
I feel most confident when I’m having a good hair day.
I think I feel most confident when not flatulent.
tweet–https://twitter.com/mami2jcn/status/228557094402551808
thanks for the tweet sweet.
I am most confident when I work out and notice that my clothing fits better.
Yes! when the buttons button look out, I’m back!
BHDad and I are sort of looking forward to the days without PMS and fear of pregnancy.
I begged Henry to get the snip. He took mercy on me and did.
This article is soooo helpful and informative!
I feel the most confident when I am well rested and wearing something that I think flatters my figure.
I tweeted! https://twitter.com/DesireeEaglin/status/228609453652598784
I was wondering which other bloggers would be crazy enough to apply for this review opportunity (like me)! So glad to have found some sisters who aren’t afraid to talk shop, and of course by shop, I mean vagizness. Hello, new friend.
Oh, and I feel most confident when I am making people laugh…as long as I’m sure they are laughing WITH me and not AT me. (Sometimes it’s hard to tell.)
I already run 10 degrees hotter than everyone else in the room. I can’t imagine how unpleasant hot flashes will be!
So far it’s still not as bad as puberty.
I’m most confident after I’ve curled my hair, done my make-up and heels of course. This happens about once a blue moon.
And I second Yvonne’s comment, I’m dreading it because I run warm too!
Today I yelled at my husband because he accidentally took my salad I was saving for MY lunch to work with him. I yelled and cried over a SALAD. But it was THEMOSTAMAZINGSALADEVER and he TOOK it. And might I add, it’s also that time of the month for me. I’m only 28 so not quite menopausal yet, but I shudder to think that if hormonal influences cause me to breakdown over a missing salad, what will I be like in 20 years? Yikes.
My bitchery sometimes has its own soundtrack.
I feel confident when I’m asked a question at work and I actually know the answer. And then I realize…I’m GOOD at what I do!
Hi Amy — good for you! We always know more than we think we do!
Can’t imagine how unpleasant hot flashes would be, i’m not there yet and not looking forward.
I am not looking forward to having to go through this.
i feel being confident just being my self!
tweet: https://twitter.com/akronugurl/status/228924284406489088 ..
i feel most confident after my daily morning hike:)
Daily. Good for you! If I exercised daily I’d be on a constant high.
tweet
https://twitter.com/MeandBells/status/228933047305781248
I feel most confident after getting my hair cut and colored!
Me too.
https://twitter.com/aes529/status/228939364963610625
I feel most confident after I had a good night sleep and don’t look tired.
https://twitter.com/ElenaIstomina/status/228962429919449088
I feel most confident when I’m doing my mommy thang.
I don’t like reading about this stuff. It makes me want to stay in my 30s forever. Or at least have lots of naturally lubricated sex.
2 questions:
1. How do you decide the winner of the gift card? Is it the woman (let’s be realistic about the gender of readership here) with the funniest post? Or the woman with the most peri menopausal vaginal dryness?
2. If you win said gift card, must the $250 be spent entirely on sanitary products?
Hello Claudia — you will always be a font of lubrication well into your 90s if not beyond. The winner is sadly (As John Malkovich said repeatedly to Michelle Pfeiffer in “Dangerous Liaisons”) “beyond my control.” It will be one of those pull a comment out of a hat things (or a tweet for that matter) and the winner will be informed via the platform they submitted upon. Also the $250 can be spent on whatever you’d like. Rent or Geisha eunuchs. May the odds be ever in your favor…..
I feel most confident when I feel good about myself on the inside.
Amy — just saying that means you probably are good on the inside. All I care about is which direction gravity is pulling me now.
I tweeted
https://twitter.com/1amypugmire/status/229016008998940672
I feel most confident w/ 2 inch heels and a flowy dress
family74014 at gmail dot com
For me it would be three-inch heels and Spanx!
I feel most confident when I manage to take a shower, actually style my hair and not put it in a bum and wear some makeup. These days.. I’m not feeling very confident very often! LOL! By the way woman you always crack me up!
when i have a good hair day i feel more confident, thismomwins@gmail.com
tweet https://twitter.com/thismomwins/status/229284116787499009
thismomwins@gmail.com
when i’m having a good hair day!
https://twitter.com/DesMoinesDealin/status/229306121893081088
i feel most confident when i am wearing nice clothes and have my hair and makeup fixed nicely
i tweeted here:
https://twitter.com/bellows22/status/229731043974987776
I feel the most confident when I am wearing nice clothes, jewelry and have my hair done nicely.
tweeted
https://twitter.com/Kellydinpa/status/229751046040346624
. I feel most confident when I do what I love, which is to cook for my family.
Amy [at] utry [dot] it
I think this may be my favorite answer! I love cooking for my kids too, of course that is also when I have my glass of wine and listen to the Weepies.
tweeted about this giveaway: https://twitter.com/uTry_it/status/230175782306197504
Amy [at] utry [dot] it
I feel the most confident when I know my hormone replacement therapy patch is firmly in place!!!!
I need one of those!
I feel most confident when I feel fit, am dressed well and appropriate.
tcarolinep at gmail dot com.
https://twitter.com/tcarolinep/status/230561253133807618
when I have a great haircut and we go out to dinner
https://twitter.com/elliebunny24/status/230872060614823936
I feel most confident when I am not bloated, having a good hair day, had enough rest, exercise, and stay calm.
I think I might forego the beach landing but I would feel more confident having more information and “gear”. Thank you Poise!
tweet
https://twitter.com/BBirdie2/status/231109236485152768
I feel the most confident after my husband compliments me on my outfit- he doesn’t usually say much, so when he does, it means a lot!
chambanachik@gmail.com
Tweeted: https://twitter.com/chambanachik/status/231254341405773824
I’m most confident when I’m working out. I’m sure I look a mess, but that doesn’t keep me from feeling pretty great about myself in that moment.
I feel saintly and sexy after a good workout.
DURING TIMES WHEN LIFE IS GOING AT IT’S BEST!
2ND ENTRY TWEET HERE! CROSSING MY FINGERS! https://twitter.com/kytah00/status/232517272428744704
When I have my makeup on
https://twitter.com/HappyTina0115/status/232584463601766400
I’m most afraid of bodily malfunction when I’m presenting in front of other people, and confident if I do a good job. Thanks for the review and giveaway.
songyueyu at gmail
tweet: https://twitter.com/syytta/status/232726621688311808
songyueyu at gmail
I feel most confident when I’ve had a great ride on my horse.
Tweeted.
https://twitter.com/Jayne_Martin/status/233029679630675968
A new outfit always makes me feel confident.
I feel confident when I am doing things I know I rock at doing – and when I get compliments later its a major confidence boost!
tweeted https://twitter.com/patis2000/status/233936796994650113
When I’m dressed up and looking sexy
when I achieve a goal!
I feel most confident when I’m wearing my scarf.
https://twitter.com/mrsayubi/status/235499102362796032
tweeted
I feel most confident in a new outfit
Me too!
https://twitter.com/kelliechio/status/235814635910090752
tweeted
I feel most confident after getting my waxing done and a pedicure!
The dreaded waxing. One session and it was laser hair removal for me. Yeoooowww! (Oh, were you talking about your legs?)
tweeted https://twitter.com/pittsy82/status/235885251690364928
A new haircut always makes me feel confident
https://twitter.com/LAMusing/status/235986739695595520
I feel confident in a nice outfit and a little make-up.
I am most confident when I pamper myself and get a pedicure. It makes me feel good, which in turn, makes me feel confident!
I’m most confident when out with my husband and he comments how great I look. After 3 kids this is always great to hear.
https://twitter.com/jen_r_horn/status/236175510831501312
I feel confident when I have on cute outfit!
tweet
https://twitter.com/ajoy1332/status/236990918614478848
I feel confident when I smile! Thanks for a chance to win and have a great day!
kmassmanATgmailDOTcom
I am most confident in sweatpants, a tshirt, with one hand in a bag of chocolates and the other holding a good book.
I feel most confident after I have had my teeth cleaned at the dentist!
I tweeted
https://twitter.com/Ilovemybeagle2/status/237700311320498177
I feel confident when I lead spinning class and the men in the class are having trouble keeping up! LOL
tweet https://twitter.com/88MichelleS/status/237741458231271424
[...] by brands and so far I’ve written two in two years (Ultherapy haul-your-aged-flesh-up and Poise’s menopause line – sexy, I know). This is number three because it just makes [...]
I feel most confident when I have my hair colored. Getting my roots touched up and my hair highlighted boosts my confidence. altern147 [at] yahoo [dot] com
I am most confident when I’m in attractive well fitting clothing with a hair style I love.
Tweeted – https://twitter.com/willitara/status/238465944500981760
I’m most confident when I’m out with my grandsons and everyone mistakes them for my children.
Thanks for the giveaway!
eswright18 at gmail dot com
tweet
https://twitter.com/eswright18/status/238708316107329536
eswright18 at gmail dot com
I feel confident now because all the worse things in life are behind me, I survived all of them and getting older is really fun.
When I have had a good night’s sleep.
So far for me, the hot flashes only last about 30 secs., and only periodically. That STILL beats the he** out of a 5 day period!! And, I have found Sam-E, an anti-anxiety supplement that helps you sleep as well as takes away the raving-bitchiness! I’m all over that shiznit!
I am most confident right after my workouts. I feel like I can take on the world!
“The second talk.” I love this concept!
I feel most confident when my husband tells me he loves me.
I tweeted about this.
https://twitter.com/RealWomanofPhil/status/238773669718024194
I feel most confident when I am prepared and well rested
https://twitter.com/mermont84/status/238797966348009472
I feel most confident when I’m with my friends. I can take on the world!!
I can actually see that image. Love it.
Tweeted http://twitter.com/chipdip2010/status/238856467606822912
I feel most confident when I cook a meal and everyone tells me how good it is and I can tell they really mean it! Cooking for friends and family is how I show I love them, so their liking it is important for my ego!
I tweeted here: https://twitter.com/MsTofuFairy/status/239032271183687680
I feel most confident when I’m in the swimming pool teaching my Arthritis Class.
Thanks for the contest.
blogged: http://slehan.blogspot.com/2012/08/win-250-visa-from-poise-and-blogher-824.html
having nice crisp clothes makes me feel confident! Thanks for a super giveaway!
Tweeted:
https://twitter.com/anashct3/status/239200065678360577
Thanks for the chance to win!
email: anashct1 [at] yahoo [dot] com
I feel most confident when people smile at me and I realize that I’ve got something good going on. BTW – The replies on this post have me cracking up!
Me too! I feel most confident when I can button my pants.