June 18th, 2012
Hello Ladies and Gents who might feel bad about their necks and nasal-labial folds.
I had my Ultherapy treatment today. I’m still a little high on the 10 milligrams of Vicodin, 5 milligrams of Valium and 325 milligrams of Tylenol I was given so if I accidentally refer to myself as Catherine The Great in this post please be aware there is no truth to the rumors about me and horses.
What, you may ask, is Ultherapy?
In Shannon Vernacular it’s this cool device thingy that zaps you with ultrasound rays which help you produce more collagen thereby lifting all the sagging bits of your face up. In the Ultherapy brochure it’s described as “a novel micro-focused ultra-sound modality for non-invasive, non-surgical skin rejuvenation and lifting.”
I was immediately greeted by Dr. Fitzgerald’s RN, the charming, whipsmart Angela Sarff who, I was reassured to discover, received her training at UCLA. Being a UCLA alumni myself I superstitiously believed she wouldn’t destroy me and the generations of Collearys to come.
First I signed my life away…
Then I was given the aforementioned pain killers which put me in a jolly mood so that when I went in to have my Before Photos taken I wasn’t too traumatized by how much I’m beginning to look like my ancestors circa 1900.
Note here: The best candidates for Ultherapy are patients between the ages of 40 and 60 years old with early signs of laxity. Beyond that you may be more in the surgical face lift category.
After my photos were taken from every angle (some which I really didn’t want to see) Angie retrieved me and brought me to the Ultherapy room to prepare me for my treatment. My face was divided into quadrants, which reminds me that I am multi-faceted or a Star Wars Sith character.
The purpose of doing this is to separate the face and neck in such a way that the correct amount of ultra-sound is administered to each region. The Ultherapy machine has four different transducers (or hand thingys) which deliver different depths of Ultrasound depending on the depth of the different parts of the face and neck.
For instance, the mouth and eye area receive only 1.5 millimeters of targeted ultra-sound from the correct transducer because the depth of the skin, fat and muscle in that region is thinner, whereas the cheeks and neck receive a depth of 4.5 millimeters in order to reach farther into the SMAS (Superficial Muscular Aponeurotic System – which basically means the musculature of the face).
The photo below demonstrates how many zaps my skin received with 4.5 millimeters of depth (i.e. 30-31 on the cheeks, 20 on the neck) and how many zaps with 3.0 millimeters of depth (28 on cheek, 20 on neck).
Once the drugs kicked in Angie began to administer the Ultherapy.
Yes, it is gonna hurt. It won’t hurt like giving birth. Or being eaten by a Siberian Tiger.
However, there will be pain. Medical professionals like to call it “discomfort,” but it’s pain. Having said that, with the drugs (and you must take them) it is completely bearable. You lie there thinking “no pain, no gain.” Angie handed me this cool vibrator (no, not one of those! Sheesh), but the kind you can hold in your hand and press against your face. Somehow the vibrator when pressed against a part of your face that isn’t being zapped, distracts you from the pain.
Also, Angie is very interesting. We had a very nice chat while she was administering the zaps and she was sure to tell me how many she was going to do and how many we had left (much like a pilates instructor telling you how many butt crunches you have left). And it was really only the 4.5 transducer that was a little painful. The 3.0 and the 1.5 were quite pain free.
The very best part of Ulthera is that everything is happening well below the surface of your skin so that you look perfectly fine when you’re leaving. No bruising, no red marks, worst case scenario is you’re still a little high from painkillers and may resemble Don Draper after a 3 martini lunch.
You must have someone to drive you home after Ultherapy due to your drug-induced hilarity (Henry didn’t seem to enjoy my Knock Knock jokes), then you may want to have a nap.
There’s no residual pain after treatment. I feel just fine, but it will be one to three months before my results are visible so there won’t be any Before and After Photos in this post. I’ll go back to Dr. Fitzgerald’s office to have my After Photos taken so I can post them in a second post here. So stay tuned.
(Full Disclosure: An Ultherapy treatment runs between $2,000-$3500. Ultherapy gave me a complementary treatment so that I would review their product. I was in no way required to write a positive review. I’d been saving money to have this procedure done well before Ultherapy contacted me with this opportunity. This is the first sponsored post I’ve ever done because it’s a product I wanted to try. All opinions expressed by me on any product I’m sponsored to write about will be straight-forward and truthful.)
UPDATE: I’m going in Oct 18th for my After Photos, check in around then to see if it worked.
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